this is the end

So that’s it. The end of my four months in the Netherlands has come.

I’m writing this from the long plane ride over the Atlantic, and as expected, this has brought a mixture of emotions.

Am I excited to be home? Of course.

Am I sad to be leaving? Of course.

Will there be things I miss? Sure! The people I’ve gotten to know, the ability to travel so freely, biking everywhere, and many little Dutch treats, just to name a few.

Are there things I’ve been longing for at home? Sure! My family, my friends there, my mom’s cooking, Alterra coffee, the ability to understand the primary language, etc.

And it’s bittersweet, just as I knew it would be. But even knowing isn’t enough preparation.

And I find it hard to balance the sadness of leaving with the joy of being home. I guess that’s a good thing, though, because it proves that I had a great experience abroad. It turned out to be everything I had hoped for, and these are memories I’ll cling to, probably for the rest of my life – there may even be stories for the future grandchildren in there somewhere!

How can I even summarize it? How can I explain all of the new things I experience and learned without taking days on end? We’ll try some quick facts, maybe:

TOTAL TIME GONE: 4 months, 1 week

TOTAL COUNTRIES VISITED: 9 – The Netherlands, Italy, Germany, Belgium, Spain, France, Austria, Lichtenstein, and Switzerland

FAVORITE COUNTRY VISITED: Austria – beautiful mountain views all around, cute and colorful towns, and really wonderfully nice people.

TOTAL SURVEY OF DUTCH COUNTRYSIDE: All the way north to the island of Texel to the very opposite corner to Maastricht and many places in between.

AMOUNT OF DUTCH KNOWN: Just above 0. I can understand a decent amount of basics and can translate most restaurant menus. But I still get laughed at every time I try to say something in Dutch to my Dutch friends.

FAVORITE DUTCH WORD: “Doi!” (‘DO-ee’ meaning something like “See ya!”)

FAVORITE DUTCH MEAL: Stampot – like loaded mashed potatoes.

CLASSES TAKEN: British Literature, American Film, and Electricity and Magnetism

ARTICLES OF CLOTHING ACQUIRED: A couple dresses, a couple shirts, a skirt, some shoes, and too many scarves.

SUITCASE WEIGHTS: To Amsterdam – 54 lbs. To Milwaukee – 44 lbs.

PEOPLE WHO CAME TO VISIT: My Family (Mom, Dad, and Becky) and My “Second Family” (Sarah Sufferling and her mom!)

HARDEST MOMENT: There's a couple contenders - (1) the first few days in Amsterdam when everything was completely brand new, and we were hungry and had yet to find the grocery store (2) when my family left after their visit (3) my physics final.

A FEW HABITS TO BRING HOME: Coffee every morning, bringing my own bags to the grocery store, taking opportunities that present themselves, being very intentional in my relationships, biking all the time

THE MOMENT I FINALLY FELT LIKE I HAD ARRIVED: At one point, I was standing in line at the grocery store watching some foreigners in front of me fumbling with the system. So I helped the cashier ease the situation and shuffle them on through. Then it was my turn. And she began a conversation with me about it in Dutch. I had to ask her to speak in English instead – this was too much for my very limited vocabulary. And she apologized and said she was sorry she had spoken Dutch to me! I was so excited and assured her that it was nothing but a compliment to me. It meant I understood the system and seemed to her to be a local.

A COUPLE IMPORTANT LESSONS LEARNED: It’s better to ask questions that might be stupid if it saves you from looking stupid later. Biking in a dress or skirt is not impossible. God is orchestrating everything – every opportunity, every circumstance, every interaction.

As this journey comes to a close, I’m excited to learn what God will do with me next. 

Until then - 

Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy, because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. 

[PHILIPPIANS 1:2-6]

[And as an addendum seeing as I'm obviously publishing this well after I wrote it: Life back at home is great. I walked out of the terminal to find a welcoming party composed of my dad, older sister, and four of the best friends any girl could ask for. They brought me flowers and made a sign and were SUCH a welcome surprise. Oh, and did I mention that my room was absolutely decked out and that they were the culprits of that as well? It's wonderful to see those that I love that I have so missed this past semester, and those hellos are not nearly finished. Hopefully I'll have a chance to say hello and catch up with you soon! And thanks again for coming on this journey with me!]